Brene Brown
- Hearing
her talk about worthiness and shame and being able to connect with people
was really enlightening. I can
relate to this with my mother and my relationship. My whole childhood, even today, I felt
like I wasn’t ever good enough in her eyes. She always made me feel unworthy and
shameful and because of that we don’t have the connection most parents
have with their children. My
father on the other hand puts me on a pedestal and always tells me how
proud he is of me. Somehow, I was
able to grow and better myself through the years and I was able to be
vulnerable, as Brene Brown says, “say I love you first” (2010). I told my boyfriend I loved him before
leaving for boot camp. I took that
plunge not know what the future holds because I was leaving for 6
months. After those 6 months, I
came home and we got married right away and we’re happier than ever. Brene Brown and our book say the same
thing that “vulnerability is not about weakness or incompetence” (Porter-O’Grady
& Malloch, 2015, p. 309).
Brene Brown says that, “vulnerability is our most accurate measurement
of courage” (2011).
18 Behaviors
- My
top 3 brightest characteristics of emotional competence are:
1.
I am curious
about the people around me. I was
talking to one of the corpsmen about his life and what he wanted to do with it
and all the sudden he said, “Ma’am, why do you care so much about us?” and it nearly
broke my heart. Why wouldn’t I care
about them?
2.
Not only do I embrace change, I am usually the one making the changes! Just this week I changed over our IV caps to
alcohol impregnated caps (and boy am I hearing the scuttle butt from that one!) but in the end it's about patient safety, not about "we've been doing it like that for years."
3.
I am very difficult to offend.
Most people make fun jabs at me just I just laugh along with them. If you can’t laugh with them, what’s the
point? Life’s too short!
- My
3 areas of improvement are:
1.
I need to understand my emotions more. I’m one of those people who will say “I feel
like poop” instead of saying something like, “I’m feeling downtrodden” but this
could be because I have a toddler at home as well. 😊
2.
I am terrible when it comes to saying no to people. I will let everything pile on top and still
manage to get it all done. My boss
finally came to me and told me I wasn’t allowed to take on any more
responsibilities because I have too much already. On top of my job, collateral duties, hospital
duties, getting my master’s degree, and having a family, I just found out I’m
pregnant! So now I’m juggling all of
this while extremely tired AND nauseous 😊
3.
I normally have a hard time letting go of mistakes. I learn from my mistakes but boy oh boy do I let
them linger and haunt me for some time.
(Bradberry, 2015).
Henry Cloud
Henry Cloud’s second
point was doing “anything that requires them to be someone they are not” which
for me is not true (2014). As I was
growing up people always used to tell me I’d be a good nurse. I NEVER thought I’d end up in healthcare, I fainted
at the sight of blood! (Don’t worry, I don’t anymore!) I finally didn’t know what to do with my life
so I joined the Navy, they made me a Corpsmen and I couldn’t be happier where I
am today. Everything happens for a
reason.
I agree 100% when Henry
Cloud says, “Once you get that it truly is impossible to please everyone, you
being to live purposefully, trying to please the right people” (2014). When I first got into leadership, I tried my
very hardest to please everyone.
Finally, I realized that I can’t, no one can. A huge weight was lifted
off my shoulders.
Simon Sinek
I am lucky enough to
serve my country and I can relate to what Simon Sinek talks about in the
beginning of this webcast because I work with brothers and sisters. I think the bond is a little more when you’re
deployed or overseas but either way, we’re all away from our families and where
we grew up. We all volunteered to serve
our country and the comradery we share because of that is beautiful. We don’t even have holidays alone, because we’re
always together, ensuring no one is left behind. Simon Sinek says that, “We are social animals
and we respond to the environments we’re in and leaders are responsible for
building that environment” (2016). Our
Department Head on the ward is energetic, he’s compassionate and you can really
tell that he cares about everyone who works there.
Rethinking Thinking
I learned a couple years
ago not to waste energy on things you have no control over. This message changed my life. If someone were to cut me off, what good will
it do getting upset over it? It’s just
wasted energy. I’d rather spend my time
being happy and joyful rather than angry and bitter over things I have no
control over.
If you were to ask a coworker, “What’s it like to sit on
the other side of me?” what would he or she say?
I think my coworker would say
that I am competent, yet not afraid to ask questions. I'm humble yet have a confidence about me. They have told me before that they could see
me in ten years coming back to our hospital as a Captain in the Navy and overseeing
the hospital. They see leadership in my
future. They respect me for working as
hard as I have to get to where I am today and that I’m not slowing down. They see me as a solid role mode. I am proud of who I've become.
References
Bradberry, T. (2015, April 28). 18 Behaviors of
Emotionally Intelligent People. Retrieved April 05, 2017, from
http://time.com/3838524/emotional-intelligence-signs/
Brown, B.
(2010, June). Retrieved April 02, 2017, from https://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_on_vulnerability
Cloud, H. (2014, June 24). 10 Things Successful
People Never Do Again. Retrieved April 07, 2017, from
http://www.success.com/article/10-things-successful-people-never-do-again
Porter-O'Grady, T. & Malloch, K.
(2015). Quantum leadership: Building better partnerships for sustainable health
(4th ed.).
Sinek, S. (2016, June 07). Retrieved April 08, 2017,
from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NzBqJNh8z2U
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